Forgiveness

Forgiveness is amazing. When it's done from the heart and with real sincerity, it can have so much power. I really believe forgiveness is most beneficial to the one giving it. For me, it has profoundly affected my life recently. For about four and half years I've been holding on to a lot of things from a past relationship. While I felt I was over it, I wasn't aware of how much I had still been holding on to it until I truly forgave. It wasn't something I was actively pursuing. Well, at least not recently. I remember going to General Conference a year after the incident and hearing Elder Faust's talk, The Healing Power of Forgiveness. It struck me so deeply, and I wanted more than anything to feel that healing power.

But forgiveness, at least for me, didn't come quickly or easily. I wanted it to come with a snap of my fingers. Maybe if I had worked on it more earnestly, it would have.

And then just the other night, it came. It was so sudden and out of left field, that I wasn't quite sure what to do with it. I truly felt in my heart that all was forgiven. And with that forgiveness came a huge freeing--of my troubles, my heavy heart, my fears, and my inability to move past it. It was so powerful that I couldn't believe it had taken me this long to finally feel that forgiveness. I let the other party in the incident know my feelings, and it was nice to know that both of us have changed for the better since the incident and are working on our flaws. Cathartic doesn't even begin to describe the experience.

Forgiveness comes when you are ready. Some times it's a few months, other times it's a few years. But it's definitely worth it.